hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Your topless pictures make me question reality
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Randomize
