i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
