I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
