I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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