I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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