I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I think people are normalizing furries
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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