all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
