Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Randomize
