I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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