Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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