Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
She's the barista slut.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
