Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
