My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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Randomize