Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
