I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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