Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
