suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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