When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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