Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
