I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
