"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize