There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
