Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Randomize
