We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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