that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
