oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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