Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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