What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
The feeling are messing with the penis
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
