I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Michael Bay diarrhea
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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