not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
