Ambien. No doubt about it.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I have post one night stand depression
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