If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
