i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize