If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
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