I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
