It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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