I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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