Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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