5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize
