school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Randomize