so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
There's always time for handjobs
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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