Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
