and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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