We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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