I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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