Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
