Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
