If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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