brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
