god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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